On April 6, 2022, while writing in my prayer journal, the Lord gave me these words. Hear My voice and write. To the one who has been given much, much will be required. And from the one entrusted with much, even more will be expected. Have you asked for more? You say you avoid My words—I see this. Why? Does evil sway you and fill your mind with doubt? Why do you falter? Why has the sin of lacking faith in your King overtaken you? Do you desire the things of the world more than you desire Me? Why do you seek them? Listen, for I have much to say. The things of this world are no more. Heaven has broken its seal, and angels descend. The time of the Lord is now. Remove your blinders and open your eyes so that you may see. The day of the Lord is upon you. You will be given what you ask for—more than you can see. Be expectant of the gifts I will bestow on you. Watch for them in the wonder of the Giver. I am the Lord. None can stop what is coming. I am the Lord—hear My voice. Tell the people to prepare. Tell them until they listen. Tell them of the plagues to come, for the time of suffering will be great. What horrors must man witness before they know that one God exists—and I am He? Do I bring calamity in My goodness, or from thoughts of evil? I have no thoughts of evil. Such things are not of Me and cannot exist in My presence. I am a God of love—Love I am. There is none greater. Why does man not see? Why do you not see? You weep at My words of sorrow, yet your heart knows I am Love. Does a father allow his children to stray without correction? Man suffers because of his own choices. Can goodness coexist with suffering? Or is suffering born from the absence of goodness and the failure to see the Lord and His might? A heart full of love and joy—that is what I desire. Mankind chooses, and they shall receive what they longed for. Evil born of wickedness will prevail until My people recognize the works of My hand— the wonders I, the Lord, bring in My great love for them. Hearts will cast out wickedness in favor of goodness. What must I do to bring this state of being into the hearts I have created? My Word will become as gold, replacing the treasure they cling to. Will it bring them honor? Will it calm their souls as cities burn and calamity unfolds? My people cannot comprehend nor feel in their hearts the love I have for them, born from sorrow that must be endured. Even My church will suffer, as corrupt pastors—shepherds who allowed their flocks to scatter into the wilderness—will suffer with the wicked. Why do they not see their evil, the darkness they consume? Guard your heart. Prepare your house. The time of the Lord is now. I can wait no longer. Evil must be overcome. My heart weeps for what I must do. Why are My people so obstinate? Do they think their Creator has forgotten them? Do they believe I am not the Great I Am? They will be awakened from their slumber. The time of the Lord is now. My people must see and know that I am the Lord, or they will be lost forever. How could a loving God desire such horror? How? Have I not revealed Myself time and again? Why are My people blinded by the very light I created? Their hearts have been overtaken by the desires of what they see— desires for things that will be washed away in the days to come. Those days will be long and hard. They must be, until stiff necks are made limber— until knees buckle and fall to the ground in awe of their Creator and His love. Tell the people. This is the Word of the Lord. Write no more. Scripture references Luke 12:48, Jeremiah 7:24, Hebrews 4:13, James 1:14–15, 2 Corinthians 11:3, 1 John 2:15, Joel 2:1, Zephaniah 1:14, James 1:17, Revelation 15:1, Exodus 9:14, Hebrews 12:6, Proverbs 3:12, Jeremiah 23:1–2, Ezekiel 34:10, Exodus 3:14, Hebrews 13:8, and Philippians 2:10–11

On October 28, 2022, the Lord gave me these words: "Hear the words of your Father, He who sits on high. Am I not the Lord? Do you not see the works of My hand? Your heart is willing, but your soul is weak. Hear what the Lord Almighty says about the days that will come. When I, the Lord, speak, what I say will surely happen. You have spoken My words. My other messengers do the same, but do My people listen? Why must I bring disaster for My people to see? Why must their hardship be long, their hunger and thirst be extended? I see what you cannot. I see the stubbornness of My people. I see how they hunger and thirst for the things of the world. Where am I? Do I matter in the least to them? I am nothing in their eyes but a figment of imagination, never thought of, surely not worshipped. You see with your eyes the terror as it unfolds. You see the persecution of those who call Me Lord. Evil men plot and scheme. Your government leads the people to ruin, yet people fail to see. My church slumbers in weakness, their desire for things far from Me. When will they rise? What must I do to make even My church rise against the evil they are blind to? My creation is perverted in ways man cannot imagine, yet they sleep. Why do My words to you become old? Do I, the Lord, bring judgment without warning? My judgment falls. Elections of righteous men will fail. Even the righteous rely on their strength, not the strength and wisdom of the Lord. They fail to see whom they fight. Their eyes are blind to the unseen things—the wickedness that surrounds them. In their arrogance, they have no need for God. Their foolhardy minds trust their wisdom. They trust in others who are no different from them. How will your country fall? How will it be reborn with goodness? Can man fight the gods of evil in his strength? Can he bring them down from the high places they reign? Hear the words of the Lord and His judgment on the nations. Fear not to say to the people these things that will come. To the common man and their wisdom, these things and events are not of substance. Famine is far from their minds. Plagues of illness and plagues that bring sorrow and tears lie in wait, soon to be released by the might of My hand. But even then, as the people see with their eyes, their hearts will be numb. They will surely say, ‘This cannot be from the Lord. He is but a figment to the weak. We are our own gods. We control our destiny.’ They will say, ‘Who is this God you speak of? Have we not imprisoned our adversaries? Where is His greatness? Can the might of His hand come against the walls we have built—the pillars of strength that hold us fast?’ The Lord will be silent to their mocking. His silence will not be found in His answer to their questions. His silence will roar at the might of His hand. The tower of evil will not fall. God will allow the wicked to continue their reign. The cries of outrage and injustice will continue. All those who know Me will begin to see that I am their justice. The pillars will weaken by the strength of their prayers, their cries to the One who can change what is before their eyes. The chill in their bones, the hunger, and the injustice they have been silent to. But My people will lift their prayers, and My hand will thunder. My voice will be heard through the power of My mighty right hand. I will strike the pillars and the foundations. The gods that rule will fall. Evil men will cry out to them, but they will not be found. I, the Lord, have authority over all. I, the Lord, have allowed them to rule from their thrones of unrighteousness. I, the Lord, have had My fill, and they will be vanquished forevermore. Then men who sought their power and strength, those who have championed their war on goodness, will be taken from the Earth. Their justice, long written, awaits. But I, the Lord, see their end. My name will be known once more. My goodness will dwell upon the Earth. My people will praise My goodness. My authority will be known. But long after you rest with Me, the end will begin. People of the Earth will drift from Me again, as My chosen people have done—as it has been written in My Word. Then I, the Lord, will bring forth the things foretold, and the Earth will be no more. I will fold up the constellations as I once stretched them. The people will be one forever. These things will be. Tell the people. Tell them without fail. Tell them now."

On February 13, 2023, the Lord gave me these words:  “I have heard your praise. My courts sing My praise as you sing My praise. I, the Lord God, am worthy of all praise. A man desires to prophesy, but does that man listen? Do the people listen to his words? No, they laugh and mock, refusing to believe words so grand—words full of wonder and truth from the Lord on High. Those who do not listen will perish—the folly of their unfaithfulness their downfall. Why do My people not listen? Why do My teachers not speak against the evil before them? Why do they not cast it to the pit by the mighty name of the Lord God, Jesus, on high? Their ignorance will be called out; their leaders will be held accountable for their lack of faithfulness to the truth of My Word. My Word, the Word of Almighty God, has been polluted, distorted, cast aside, and thrown into the dung heap. My heart weeps. I have no choice. I, the Lord, must act. I will lay waste to the idols man has worshiped, to the cities built in honor of themselves. Parents have not told their children. Such is the way of wickedness. Such is the way that fools follow the foolhardy. Parents will be held accountable for their children; they will be held accountable for themselves. I, the Lord, made them. I, the Lord, made all things to bring honor and glory to Me, to have My creation sing of My goodness and faithfulness. I, the Lord, did this for fellowship with man. I, the Lord, made all that is—the stars, the heavens, and all that is in them—to bring Me glory, for man to see that there is one greater than he. I have healed the sick in My faithfulness. I have pulled man from the pit of death in My faithfulness, in the love I have for every man and creature I have created. Has man marveled at My wonder? Do they see the mighty works of My hand and know that One exists greater than they? No! They have squandered My faithfulness for the lusts of the flesh, for the temporary pleasures born of the evil one. Eyes have been blinded in numbers unseen for all creation. Yet I, the Lord, patiently wait for man to look to Me, to look to the love and faithfulness that created them. But they look not. They look upon themselves with wonder at the things they have created with the hands I have given them. They have shouted their praise—not praise to the Lord. When cities fall and the earth has washed away under their feet, will they cry out to Me? Oh, they will cry out. They will cry out and curse the God of judgment, the God who has brought calamity to their land. They will raise their hand as it falls to the depths of the earth, never to be raised again. This is the thing I, the Lord, must do. Can wickedness exist with holiness? My cloak will not be stained with the ignorance of the wicked. I, the Lord, will not have that. I, the Lord, deserve none of it. But I, the Lord, will hear those whose hearts cry to Me in repentance—those whose eyes see what their pride has brought them, why their arrogance has rested pain on their doorstep. They will cry out to Me, and I will listen, for I am a good God. I, the Lord, will gather them to My bosom and protect them. I, the Lord, will shield them under My wing as disaster unseen falls upon the land. Cities will burn, and houses will crumble; herds and flocks will hunger and thirst, looking for land to graze and water not found. My people, young and old, will understand that there is but one God, and I Am He. There is one God who can shelter and feed them, but one God who can save them from the storm born of mercy. There is one God, and I Am He—the Lord God Almighty, who saves. Write no more. Your words will be made known by He who has given them to you. Tell the people this.”

The Lord gave me these words on December 13, 2022: “Hear the words of He who sits on high. Lord of all Lords. King of all Kings. Hear My words and write. Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain? The kings of the earth take their stand, and the rulers gather together against the Lord and His Anointed One. (Acts 4:25-26)  Who are these Kings, says the Lord? Are they greater than Me? Does their throne rise above Mine? Yet, the people worship them. They worship in ruin, blinded by the one who seeks their souls. Hear the word of the Lord and write. Judgment comes, says the Lord - plague upon plague, ruin upon ruin. Tears will fall, lives ruptured by lies, yet man consumes. Hear the word of the Lord. Your country as it stands today will not change. It continues down the road of deceit. Fear not to write these words. I have said them once and will say them again. Elections of righteous men will fail. Kings in the hidden places rule where man cannot see. Kings do not give up their charge by the will of lesser men. The kings that rule this day will not cede their throne until I, the Lord, remove them. No justice of man will overcome their wicked plans. The kings of the earth and those that follow them know not whom they have angered. ‘Long have I been asleep.’ they say. ‘Does the Almighty care what we do with His people? Is He as great as the ancients say, or does He cower by the might of our numbers?’ Hear the word of the Lord. I will rip the kings from their thrones and topple the idols they have built to themselves. Their wealth will be plundered by the subjects they have ruled. Their bodies will be mourned by few. I, the Lord, grieve for My people.’ Hear the word of the Lord and write. My people will scatter and run. I, the Lord, say to stand strong. Who can come against the Lord and His might? Who dares say he is greater than the Lord, that his ways are pure and righteous, that his love is higher? The kings of evil deceive the people with the lusts of the flesh. Will these things bring them honor? Will they save them from the pit? Why does man plot against the One who gave them breath and life? Why does woman follow the deceit of many? Why do My people reject what is good and seek what destroys them? Do I, the Lord, not matter? Do I, the Lord, frighten their souls? Does the one who seeks them lead them to harm? The lies are many, but now lies are exposed. Who will bring justice to those found guilty? Can evil punish evil? Does man not see that the wicked rule the exposed? Will that man cast his brother into the fire, or will he be exalted for all to see? Some will say, ‘Where is justice?’ Others, ‘Hail to the king.’ What king do they worship? They worship the kings of the continents. They worship the kings of deception, the kings of old. I, the Lord, have had My fill. The people will see what the idols they worship have brought them. They will cry out, but I will not listen. I listen to those who have cried in silence for year upon year, for time upon time. I, the Lord, know the hearts of My people. I, the Lord, will protect those who worship Me in the madness. I, the Lord, close My ears to those who cry from their lips, not their hearts. Do I, the Lord, not see their wickedness? Do their cries for justice fall on My ears? I, the Lord, know their hearts. I have seen their deeds. They will reap what they have sown till I, the Lord, have compassion for them. I, the Lord, will see their cries of evil turn to cries of a pure heart. I, the Lord, will answer them. They will see My hand thunder from the heavens and remove with fury kings from their thrones. I will crush the princes and elders who have carried out the proclamations made by them. No mercy will be found for the rulers and their courts. I, the Lord, will have compassion on the people who have been swayed by the evil one. Their sons and daughters will know that there is but one God, and I am He.”

Today is April 18, 2024, and after my quiet time this morning, the first thing on my to-do list was to transcribe a journal entry from day 1,435. I began numbering the days after the Shekinah glory of the Lord descended on me, which lasted for ten days in March 2019. About two months after my encounter, the Lord began speaking to me about future events and has continued to do so. During the last five years, the theme of the Lord’s words has been consistent and has not changed. He has said that if we do not repent as a nation, He, in His goodness and love, will bring judgment on our land. In reading the second and third chapters of Jeremiah this morning, I could not help but think about the parallels of the times. As God brought judgment on Israel, He will bring judgment on the United States. We have forgotten God. In Jeremiah 2:32b, He says, “Yet my people have forgotten me, days without number.” We have sought evil, not goodness. Our gods are idols of money, things, power, and status. Jeremiah 2:11-12 says, “Has a nation ever changed its gods? (Yet they are not gods at all.) But my people have changed their glory for worthless idols. Be appalled at this, O heavens, and shudder with great horror,” declares the Lord. God has often told me, “Your country as you know it is no more.” And God, in His love, will bring judgment on our land, but it will not last forever. Jeremiah 3:11 says, “I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful, declares the Lord. I will not be angry forever. Only acknowledge your guilt.” 1435 days after God showed up to me, on February 13, 2023, during my quiet time, the Lord spoke to me and here is what he said,  “I have heard your praise. My courts sing My praise as you sing My praise. I, the Lord God, am worthy of all praise. A man desires to prophesy, but does that man listen? Do the people listen to his words? No, they laugh and mock, refusing to believe words so grand—words full of wonder and truth from the Lord on High. Those who do not listen will perish—the folly of their unfaithfulness their downfall. Why do My people not listen? Why do My teachers not speak against the evil before them? Why do they not cast it to the pit by the mighty name of the Lord God, Jesus, on high? Their ignorance will be called out; their leaders will be held accountable for their lack of faithfulness to the truth of My Word. My Word, the Word of Almighty God, has been polluted, distorted, cast aside, and thrown into the dung heap. My heart weeps. I have no choice. I, the Lord, must act. I will lay waste to the idols man has worshiped, to the cities built in honor of themselves. Parents have not told their children. Such is the way of wickedness. Such is the way that fools follow the foolhardy. Parents will be held accountable for their children; they will be held accountable for themselves. I, the Lord, made them. I, the Lord, made all things to bring honor and glory to Me, to have My creation sing of My goodness and faithfulness. I, the Lord, did this for fellowship with man. I, the Lord, made all that is—the stars, the heavens, and all that is in them—to bring Me glory, for man to see that there is one greater than he. I have healed the sick in My faithfulness. I have pulled man from the pit of death in My faithfulness, in the love I have for every man and creature I have created. Has man marveled at My wonder? Do they see the mighty works of My hand and know that One exists greater than they? No! They have squandered My faithfulness for the lusts of the flesh, for the temporary pleasures born of the evil one. Eyes have been blinded in numbers unseen for all creation. Yet I, the Lord, patiently wait for man to look to Me, to look to the love and faithfulness that created them. But they look not. They look upon themselves with wonder at the things they have created with the hands I have given them. They have shouted their praise—not praise to the Lord."

On March 8, 2022, the Lord gave me these words: "The time is upon you. I have had My fill. Man says, 'There is no God. If there is a God, where is He?' My voice will thunder, declaring My praise. Mountains will tremble, seas will roar—a song by My mouth and true to My glory. Watch the hand of the Lord shake the foundations of the earth. Watch as I, the Lord, declare My presence and authority. Watch! Is love not declared in My authority? If not, then where is it found? Is it found where no caring exists? Where there is no heart for others? Is love found when widows starve, when children go hungry? Is love found when man thirsts for water, the means of existence? Man does not find love in these places. Only the love of the Lord is found. Do men full of the world's wealth care about the fatherless, those in need? Do they look upon them in their squalor and weep? They sit in high places of their own making, not caring to see beyond their selfish desires, born out of deceit and wickedness. I, the Lord, have had My fill of their gluttony and perversion. Can their might save them in the presence of their Maker? They will be turned to dust, those I have chosen. Others will repent as they behold the hand of the Holy One. I say, I have had My fill! My people are slaughtered by wickedness—by those who refuse to believe that a God who judges looks upon their deeds in disgust. Their eyes will see the destruction of idols, those things their evil hearts have exalted above Me—the One who gave His all out of love, the One who gives each breath they take. Who cares for their children? Those forgotten in their misery? Those sold to men for profit? Those sold by vile men to inflict pain and suffering in abuse of the weak? I, the Lord, care! I, the Lord, spew them from My mouth. I, the Lord, will show My hand of thunder to them, striking them with blows from which they cannot recover. I, the Lord, will crush their wickedness." "My people—those forgotten by man, those who suffer on account of Me—will see the hand of the Lord fall on their oppressors, never to rise again. The oppressed will see their God, see their protector. They will see the One to whom they have cried for justice, the One who holds their tears. They will see their tears filling the lungs of their oppressors, drowning them in the misery they have inflicted. They will see the love of the Lord, born of the authority He carries. They will see the love of the One who has not forgotten, the One who loves them without end. I say, repent if you are guilty. Repent if your heart is vile. Repent of idols born of self, born of the treasure of an evil world. Repent if you have led others astray. Repent of your sin. Call out to the One who gave it all, who has the power to cleanse you. Call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Those who slumber, wake up. Those who blind their eyes to suffering, open them. Hear the words of the Lord. Bow low in His presence. Tremble at His authority. Have peace in the love that surrounds Him. Have peace in the love of Him who speaks to you. See the Lord of love. Worship Him, for He is your King."

Do You See the Battle Lines Form?

On Wednesday, March 13, 2019, God revealed Himself in our home in Baja California, Mexico, in a deeply personal way. Through visions, miracles, prophecies, and the undeniable yet inaudible voice of Almighty God, He made Himself known to Randal. We wrote a book to share our story, attempting to explain what happened and the profound impact it had on our lives. And yet, our words are wonderfully inadequate. How can anyone contain Almighty God? Who can fully describe Him? Who can capture even a glimpse of His glory, majesty, and holiness? Randal has shared revelations about Jesus—things neither of us had ever known. The God he encountered is not bound by the laws of physics or any human constraints. He does not fit into the boxes we create. No words in any language can adequately describe Him; they simply do not exist. And yet, if anyone were to experience Jesus as Randal did, they would have no choice but to love Him with every ounce of their being—down to the very last subatomic particle. His love is overwhelming, all-consuming. As Paul wrote in Romans 8:39, “Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” I have heard Randal say many times, “If everyone could experience Him as I did, they would want Jesus as their best friend. He would be the center of their lives, and the world would be a different place.” Though I didn’t experience Jesus in the way Randal did during God’s visit, I was a witness. And I can testify to the supernatural encounter that changed my husband’s life—and mine—forever. Not everyone will have the privilege of such an experience, which is why it’s so important to share our story as God instructed. We may not be able to fully describe who Jesus is, but we can offer others a glimpse of the love and joy that comes from knowing Him. Before God’s visitation, sharing our story with the world was something we never would have considered. Our story is filled with brokenness. Randal and I have loved God for most of our lives, yet we were deeply flawed and disobedient. Still, even in our darkest moments—though we were unaware—He was there. He held us up, even when we strayed. Our journey with Him was inconsistent, filled with setbacks and failures, but He never left us. And when we least deserved it, He showed up. Randal and I were married for eight years, divorced for five, and have now been back together for thirteen. Though we believed in Jesus for most of our lives, we struggled constantly, never finding true stability in our marriage or family. Chaos seemed to follow us—bankruptcies, lawsuits, mental illness from a traumatic brain injury, infidelity, shame, failed businesses, and the relentless stress of blending our family from past broken marriages. And yet, through all of it, there was purpose. When God supernaturally healed Randal, He began healing me as well. God gave meaning to every day of Randal’s life—even the worst ones. The good, the bad, the devastating, and the joyful—He showed us that none of it was wasted. Why did He choose to reveal Himself in this way? Why did He choose to heal Randal? I’ve learned that some things are not for us to understand. What I do know is that God showed up and gave two very broken people many gifts, not only for ourselves but for our children. He became Randal’s Father when he lost his own. And He did the same for me. He is a good, good Papa who knows how to give the best gifts to His children. He is everyone’s Father. That is the heart of our story. It’s about a loving Father who keeps His promises. When I was a twelve-year-old girl who lost both my father and brother to suicide within three weeks, He comforted me. He healed my pain. He redeemed and restored a broken marriage so that we could create a new legacy through His miraculous intervention. Our story is a testimony to God’s boundless love and supernatural power to heal the brokenhearted. It’s about His desire for intimacy with every person on earth. It’s about Him being a Father to a fatherless world. That is the beautiful love story He wants us to share. And He wants you to know it too. It has taken us a long time to fully grasp it, but we now see that even in the midst of our greatest tragedies, He was with us. And He is with you too. Maybe He won’t show up in your home the way He did in ours, but that doesn’t mean His presence isn’t surrounding you, blessing you, calling you to a purpose greater than yourself. His love is boundless. The Bible speaks of it. The cross demonstrates it. No matter how broken you are. No matter how much you believe your life is ruined. No matter how many mistakes you’ve made—God’s love covers them all. His love can heal them all. His love can give purpose to them all. Today, joy pours from our hearts because we are living in the days He ordained for us. And nothing is greater. Thank You, Father, for all the gifts You have given us and continue to give. You truly are a good, good Papa. To read our full story, you can find our book, Beyond Impossible, on Amazon.

The Lord says, “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught.” — Isaiah 29:13 I surrendered my life to Christ when I was thirty and attended church regularly. I wanted a personal relationship with Christ, so I did everything I could to know Him better. I read the Bible in its entirety several times. I studied Scripture, memorized it, prayed, and did my best to obey His commands. But it seemed I still missed the mark. The phrase “a personal relationship with Jesus” is not even in the Bible. What does it mean, and is it important? My answer is not based on years of education and study but on my personal beliefs and experiences. As you probably know, my wife, Tracy, and I had a ten-day encounter with God in March 2019. It changed us forever and charted a new course in our lives. Before that time, my walk with the Lord was lukewarm at best. My friends knew I was a Christ-follower, but I lived my life as if it were mine. I didn’t deny myself and take up the cross of Jesus (Matthew 16:24-25). If someone had asked me then if I had a personal relationship with Him, I would have said yes. I may not have lived for Christ at the time, but He knew my heart was His. Some people claim to be Christians, saying and doing all the right things, but their hearts are far from the Lord. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus discusses true versus false faith: “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons, and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’” — Matthew 7:21-23 The word "know" is used in a relational sense rather than as intellectual knowledge, which means Jesus desires a personal relationship with us. “But whoever loves God is known by God.” — 1 Corinthians 8:3 Our obedience to Him is born out of love, not duty. Our Lord gave everything so we could have a relationship with Him. He said: “I no longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” — John 15:15 It has been over four years since God came to our home, and one thing remains constant. Emotion swells within me every time I share the moment when He left on the tenth day. Jesus taught me that love is the most powerful force in the universe. His love is piercing, relentless, and all-consuming. But even those words fall short. When I experienced His love, I cried, “No words, no words.” There are no words in any language that can adequately describe God’s love for us. There are no words in any language that can express His infinite nature. No words could ever possibly grasp the fullness of who our Creator is. Being in His presence was so intense that my mind could not process the reality of it until after He left. I knew that time would come, and even as overwhelming and exhausting as it was, I felt Him say, “It will be okay.” Neither of us wanted to part, but it was time. Tracy’s words from the night before came to mind: “This cannot continue at this intensity.” She was right. In my humanness, I understood what I had felt and said only six hours earlier: “I don’t think I can make it through another day.” The thought of it scared me, and it scared Tracy. At that point, He had poured Himself into me for nine days, and it was all I could withstand. I didn’t physically see Jesus, but I knew He was with me, revealing that His visit was ending. How is it possible that I was consoling Him? He didn’t need comforting—I did. At that moment, He wasn’t just my Creator but also my friend, my Daddy, my Abba Father. I was in the presence of the King of all. Now, He was leaving. And through my grief, I was also amazed because I felt peace—an intense, all-consuming peace. It was more intense than God’s revelations, the visions I saw, and even being in His presence for the previous nine days. I was drowning in His peace as He helped me endure the extreme grief of His departure. I did not want my Papa to leave! Just thinking about it, just knowing that He was going, brought more pain than I had ever endured, and I sobbed. But the peace kept surrounding me until I was finally able to acknowledge the reality: “I am in Baja on a Saturday morning, and I understand my Father is leaving.” I stared down at my journal page, now wet with my tears. If I had processed everything rationally, I would have acknowledged that He wasn’t truly leaving—His presence is everywhere. He is always with us. But this experience was ending. My mind functioned moment by moment, unable to grasp the big picture. Jesus had been here in the most personal and intimate way for ten days. Though I didn’t see Him with my physical eyes, my spiritual eyes saw His presence everywhere—in every corner, in every way. I knew He would continue to make Himself known to me, but it wouldn’t be the same. That Saturday morning, He was still with me, just as He had been for the previous nine days. Our time was intimate, as if He were sitting by the fire, having coffee with me. Neither of us said much—just small talk, like good friends, like a father and son, as we prepared for the departure. But He chose the most personal way to tell me. I could feel that He was grieving with me. It was human. It was personal. I have never called any man Papa or even used the word. It was far too personal and had never been part of my vocabulary. But at that moment, Jesus became my Papa. My Lord, my Jesus, the firstborn over all creation, was my new Dad. He hurts when we hurt and cries when we cry. He is such a personal Father that He mourns when we suffer. The sun began peeking over the mountains and onto the ocean. And I knew—He was gone. I started wailing and grieving terribly, even though I was flooded with peace and surrounded by His love. As I consoled myself, I whispered,  “It’s okay, it’s all going to be good. I’ll see Him again.”