A Personal Jesus

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A Personal Jesus

Randal Dowdy • Jul 18, 2023

Does your faith feel like a religion or a relationship?

The Lord says: “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught. Isaiah 29:13

I surrendered my life to Christ when I was thirty and attended church regularly. I wanted a personal relationship with Christ, so I did everything to know him better. I read the Bible in its entirety several times. I studied scripture, memorized it, prayed, and did my best to obey his other commands. But it seemed I still missed the mark. “A personal relationship with Jesus” is not even in the Bible. What does it mean, and is it important? My answer is not based on years of education and study but on my personal beliefs and experiences.

As you probably know, my wife, Tracy, and I had a ten-day encounter with God in March 2019. It changed us forever and charted a new course in our lives. Before that time, my walk with the Lord was lukewarm at best. My friends knew I was a Christ-follower, but I lived my life as if it were mine. I didn’t deny myself and take up the cross of Jesus. (Matthew 16:24-25). I would have said yes if someone asked if I had a personal relationship with him. I may not have lived for Christ then, but he knew my heart was his.

Some people may claim to be Christians, say, and do all the right things, but their heart is far from the Lord. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus discusses true as opposed to false faith. “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons, and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!” Matthew 7:21-23

The word "know" is used in a relational sense rather than intellectual knowledge, which can only mean that Jesus wants a personal relationship with us. But whoever loves God is known by God. 1 Corinthians 8:3 Our obedience to him is born out of love, not duty. Our Lord gave everything so we could have a relationship with him. He said, “I no longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15

It has been over four years since God came to our home, and one thing remains constant. Emotion swells within me every time I share the moment when he left on the 10th day. Jesus taught me that love is the most powerful thing in the universe. His love is piercing, relentless, and all-consuming. But even those words fall short. When I experienced his love, I cried, "No words, no words." There are no words in any language that can adequately describe God’s love for us. There are no words in any language that can express God’s infinite nature. No words could ever possibly grasp the fullness of who our creator is. Being in his presence was so intense that my mind could not think about God being there until after he left. I knew that time would come, and even as overwhelming and exhausting as it was, I felt him say, "It will be okay." Neither of us wanted to part from each other, but it was time. Tracy’s words to me from the night before came to my mind. “This cannot continue at this intensity.” She was right. In my humanness, I understood that what I had felt and said only six hours before was true when I told her, “I don’t think I can make it through another day.” The thought of it scared me, and it scared Tracy. At this point, he had poured himself into me for nine days and it was all I could withstand.

I didn’t physically see Jesus, but he was with me revealing his visit was ending . How is it possible that I was consoling Him? He didn’t need comforting. I did. At that moment, he wasn’t there as my creator but as my friend, my daddy, my Abba father. I was in the presence of the King of all. Now he was leaving. And through my grief, I was also amazed because I felt peace. It was a peace that flooded me. It was intense. The peace I felt was more intense than God’s revelations, the visions I saw, and being in the presence of almighty God for the previous nine days. I was drowning in his peace as he was helping me overcome the extreme grief of his departure. I did not want my Papa to leave! Just thinking about it, just knowing that he was going, brought more pain than I had ever endured, and it caused me to sob. But the peace kept surrounding me until slowly I was able to acknowledge this truth: “I am in Baja on a Saturday morning, and I understand my Father is leaving.” I stared down at the journal page, now wet with my tears. If I had processed everything rationally, I would have acknowledged that he wasn’t genuinely leaving—his presence is everywhere. He is with us always. But this experience was ending.

My mind seemed to operate from moment to moment, unable to see the big picture. Jesus had been here, all this time, for ten days in the most personal and intimate way. Though I didn’t gaze upon him with my physical eyes, my spiritual eyes saw his presence everywhere. In every corner, in every way. I knew he would continue to make himself known to me after he left, but it wouldn’t be the same. He was there just as he had been the previous nine days that Saturday morning. Our time was intimate, as if he was sitting by the fire having coffee with me. Neither of us said much, mostly just making small talk—as good friends, as a father and son might, as we prepared for the departure. But he had chosen the most personal way to tell me. I could tell that he was grieving with me. It was human. It was personal. I have never called any man Papa or even used the word. It was far too personal and wasn’t in my vocabulary. But at that moment, Jesus became my Papa.

My Lord, my Jesus, the firstborn over all creation, was my new dad. He hurts when we hurt and cries when we cry. He is such a personal Father that he mourns when we suffer. The sun was beginning to peek over the mountains and onto the ocean. And I knew he’d gone. I started wailing and grieving terribly, even though I was flooded with peace and surrounded by his love. As I began consoling myself, I said, "It's okay, it’s all going to be good. I’ll see him again."

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Parallels of the Times

By Randal Dowdy • 12 Apr, 2024

After my quiet time this morning, the first thing on my to-do list was transcribing day 1435 from my journal. I begin numbering the days since the shekinah glory of the Lord descended on our home, which lasted for ten days in March 2019. About two months after the encounter, the Lord began speaking to me about future events and has continued to do so. During the last five years, the theme of the Lord’s words has not changed. If we do not repent as a nation, he, in his goodness and love, will bring judgment on our land. In reading the second and third chapters of Jeremiah this morning, I could not help but think about the parallels of the times. As God brought judgment on Israel, he will bring judgment on the United States. We have forgotten God. “Yet my people have forgotten me, days without number.” Jeremiah 2:32b We have sought evil, not goodness. Our gods are idols of money, things, power, and status. “Has a nation ever changed its gods? (Yet they are not gods at all.) But my people have changed their glory for worthless idols. Be appalled at this, O heavens, and shudder with great horror.” Declares the Lord. Jeremiah 2: 11-12 God has often told me, “Your country as you know it is no more.” God, in his love, will bring judgment on our land, but it will not last forever. “I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful, declares the Lord. I will not be angry forever. Only acknowledge your guilt.” Jeremiah 3:11 excerpt On the 13 th of February 2023, the Lord said, “I have heard your praise. My courts sing my praise as you sing my praise. I, the Lord God, am worthy of all praise. A man desires to prophesy, but does he listen to my voice when I speak? Do the people listen to the words I give them? No, they laugh and mock, refusing to believe words so grand, words full of wonder and truth from the Lord on High. Those who do not listen will perish—the folly of their unfaithfulness their downfall. Why do my people not listen? Why do my teachers not speak against the evil before them? Why do they not cast it to the pit by the mighty name of the Lord God, Jesus, on high? Their ignorance will be called out; their leaders will be held accountable for their lack of faithfulness to the truth of my word. My word, the word of Almighty God, has been polluted, distorted, cast aside, and thrown into the dung heap. My heart weeps. I have no choice. I, the Lord, must act. I will lay waste to the idols man has worshiped, to the cities built in honor of themselves. Parents have not told their children. Such is the way of wickedness. Such is the way that fools follow the foolhardy. Parents will be held accountable for their children; they will be held accountable for themselves. I, the Lord, made them. I, the Lord, made all things to bring honor and glory to me, to have my creation sing of my goodness and faithfulness. I, the Lord, did this for the fellowship of man. I, the Lord, made all that is, the stars, the heavens, and all that is in them to bring me glory, for man to see that there is one greater than he. I have healed the sick in my faithfulness. I have pulled man from the pit of death in my faithfulness, in the love I have for every man and creature I have created. Has man marveled at my wonder? Do they see the mighty works of my hand and know that one exists greater than them? No! They have squandered my faithfulness for the lusts of the flesh, for the temporary pleasures born of the evil one. Eyes have been blinded in numbers unseen for all creation. Yet I, the Lord, patiently wait for man to look to me, to look to the love and faithfulness that created them. But they look not. They look upon themselves with wonder at the things they have created with the hands I have given them. They have shouted their praise, not praise to the Lord. When cities fall, and the earth has washed away under their feet, will they cry out to me? O, they will cry out. They will cry out and curse the God of judgment, the God who has brought calamity to their land. They will raise their hand as it falls to the depths of the earth, never to be raised again. This is the thing I, the Lord, must do. Can wickedness exist with holiness? My cloak will not be stained with the ignorance of the wicked. I, the Lord, will not have that. I, the Lord, deserve none of it. But I, the Lord, will hear those whose hearts cry to me in repentance. Those whose eyes see what their pride has brought them, why their arrogance has rested pain on their doorstep. They will cry out to me, and I will listen, for I am a good God. I, the Lord, will gather them to my bosom and protect them. I, the Lord, will shield them under my wing as disaster unseen falls upon the land. Cities will burn, and houses will crumble; herds and flocks will hunger and thirst, looking for land to graze and water not found. My people, young and old, will understand that there is but one God, and I am he. There is one God who can shelter and feed them, but one God who can save them from the storm born of mercy. There is one God, and I am he, the Lord God Almighty, who saves.”

The Time Is Upon You

By Randal Dowdy • 03 Apr, 2024

On March 8th, 2022 the Lord gave me these words. "The time is upon you. I have had my fill. Man says there is no God. If there is a God, where is he? My voice will thunder, declaring my praise. Mountains will tremble, seas will roar, a song by my mouth and true to my glory. Watch the hand of the Lord shake the foundations of the earth. Watch as I, the Lord, declare my presence and authority. Watch! Is love not declared in my authority? If not, then where is it found? Is it found where no caring exists? Where there is no heart for others? Is love found when widows starve, when children go hungry? Is love found when man thirsts for water, the means of existence? Man does not find love in these places. Only the love of the Lord is found. Do men full of the world's wealth care about the fatherless, those in need? Do they look upon them in their squalor and weep? They sit in high places of their own making, not caring to see beyond their selfish desires born out of deceit and wickedness. I, the Lord, have had my fill of their gluttony and perversion. Can their might save them in the presence of their maker? They will be turned to dust, those I have chosen. Others will repent as they behold the hand of the Holy One. I say I have had my fill. My people are slaughtered by wickedness, those not caring to believe that a God who judges looks upon their deeds in disgust. Their eyes will see the destruction of idols, those things their evil hearts have exalted above me. The one who gave his all out of love. The one who gives each breath they take. Who cares for their children? Those forgotten in their misery. Those sold to men for profit. Those sold by vile men to inflict pain and misery in abuse of the weak. I, the Lord, care! I, the Lord, spew them from my mouth. I, the Lord, will show my hand of thunder to them. Striking them blows from which they cannot recover. I, the Lord, will crush their wickedness.” “My people, those forgotten by man. Those who suffer on account of me will see the hand of the Lord fall on their oppressors, never to rise again. The oppressed will see their God, see their protector. They will see the one whom they have cried to for justice. The one who holds their tears. They will see their tears filling the lungs of their oppressors, drowning in the misery they have brought. They will see the love of the Lord born of the authority He carries. They will see the love of the one who has not forgotten. The one who loves them without end.“I say repent if you are guilty. Repent if your heart is vile. Repent of idols born of self, born of the treasure of an evil world. Repent if you have led others astray. Repent of your sin. Call out to the one who gave it all, who has the power to cleanse you. Call to the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Those who slumber wake up. Those who blind their eyes to suffering open them. Hear the words of the Lord. Bow low in their presence. Tremble at their authority. Have peace in the love that surrounds them. Have peace in the love of Him who speaks to them. See the lord of love. Worship Him, for He is your King.